Re: 2022 WSP UPDATED Women's Picks & Results Thread
Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2022 10:56 am
Greetings from the underground lair! It turns out it's not just TMQ's husband that has covid, but pretty much everyone on the block that isn't TMQ. It's quite apocalyptic to only have 4 guard miniature pinschers/chihuahuas for company.
There is plenty of company on the loser death barge however, as the R64 matches cleaned out our little group. It is now time to pass judgment on this pile of losers, rating their bloated corpses as DANK or STANK
Angelique Kerber (21 victims) STANK You waited one round to long and Kerber's sell by date passed. A tempting pick given how wildly erratic Mertens has been playing, but Kerber's game relies on quickness and she is definitely a slower than she used to be.
Alison Riske-Armitraj (6 victims) DANK A good pick given Riske-Armitraj's grass court pedigree. Bouzkova has been due for a breakout for a couple of years, and unfortunately for you, this might be that time.
Kaja Juvan (4 victims) STANK What were you thinking? Matches featuring Heather Watson as one of the competitors often have vultures circling over the court so heavy is the STANK of carrion. A well deserved meal for the birds.
Maria Sakkari (4 victims) DANK Maria (not Maria) is 34 and has only made it past the second round of a major once before in 15 years of trying, so TMQ can only surmise that she has sold her soul to the devil.
Barbora Krejcikova (3 victims) STANK I'm not sure that Krejcikova is 100% healthy--she was severely hampered at the French Open and didn't seem to be playing well here.
Katie Boulter (3 victims) STANK She takes out a bunch of people annually, but like "fetch" and Laura Robson, Katie Boulter is never going to happen.
Shuai Zhang (1 victim) DANK This match was well contested, so no shame here.
There is plenty of company on the loser death barge however, as the R64 matches cleaned out our little group. It is now time to pass judgment on this pile of losers, rating their bloated corpses as DANK or STANK
Angelique Kerber (21 victims) STANK You waited one round to long and Kerber's sell by date passed. A tempting pick given how wildly erratic Mertens has been playing, but Kerber's game relies on quickness and she is definitely a slower than she used to be.
Alison Riske-Armitraj (6 victims) DANK A good pick given Riske-Armitraj's grass court pedigree. Bouzkova has been due for a breakout for a couple of years, and unfortunately for you, this might be that time.
Kaja Juvan (4 victims) STANK What were you thinking? Matches featuring Heather Watson as one of the competitors often have vultures circling over the court so heavy is the STANK of carrion. A well deserved meal for the birds.
Maria Sakkari (4 victims) DANK Maria (not Maria) is 34 and has only made it past the second round of a major once before in 15 years of trying, so TMQ can only surmise that she has sold her soul to the devil.
Barbora Krejcikova (3 victims) STANK I'm not sure that Krejcikova is 100% healthy--she was severely hampered at the French Open and didn't seem to be playing well here.
Katie Boulter (3 victims) STANK She takes out a bunch of people annually, but like "fetch" and Laura Robson, Katie Boulter is never going to happen.
Shuai Zhang (1 victim) DANK This match was well contested, so no shame here.
