by Oploskoffie Whether you're a new member or someone from TAT's first incarnation, it is worth pointing out that this little community has been around for over 20 years. In internet terms, that is pretty special. What is even more special, though, are the connections that are formed through such online communities. Wonderful friendships, even.
It was through one of our old board members, Jean (hurricanejeanne), that I unfortunately just learned of the passing of Jessie, known on the old board as Jessie181. Back then, Jessie was part of what could be described as the "TAT Chat Gang", wherein he, Jean and others could talk for hours on end. He was also very much into music, listening to an inordinate amount of Tegan and Sara back in 2009. Beyond TAT, though, Jessie and Jean were close friends for nearly twenty years.
My heart goes out not only to Jessie's family, of which I have been told there are many, but definitely to Jean as well. This is very much a sad day.
by dave g Thank you for posting this. I remember seeing hurricanejeanne's name, but I don't remember Jessie181 at the moment. However, I was a relatively late-comer to the previous site.
by ponchi101 Oploskkofie, thanks for posting this. It saddens me to hear of Jessie181 passing.
If you consider it appropriate, extend my, and our, condolences to his family. May all their memories of him be wonderful, and may them remember him always with love.
RIP.
by JTContinental Very sad news--I believe they were also pretty young.
My heart goes out to their friends and family.
by ti-amie Thanks for alerting us. RIP.
by Owendonovan This is so sad. Jessie was fun to chatter with. I hope Jessie knew he was thought of fondly here.
by patrick RIP.
If I recall Aedra was part of the chat with Hurricanejeanne and Jessie181. Correct that they chat for hours to no end on TAT 1.0
by dryrunguy Damn. Jessie was a good kid. I remember him fondly. He was a key part of the longest thread in TAT history that evolved out of a question I asked in The Dumpster--why do men have nipples? That thread took a serious turn that forever altered the concept of Dumpsterism.
And then there was the Two Words thread. He was a big part of that one, too.
His adoration for chat was already mentioned. He was legendary for his participation there.
Above all else, I'll remember it was Jessie who turned me on to the band Paramore. Until he mentioned them to me in a PM conversation we were having about music, I was largely unaware of them. I know of them, but I had never made a point of listening to them. So he exposed me to them. I always appreciated that.
I think Jessie was our original bartender in the Loser's Lounge? Am I remembering that correctly? He might have even been underage at the time?
Damn. Taken far, far, far too soon. RIP, good soul.
by patrick I think Jessie181 was the original bartender in the Lounge
by Jeff from TX I came to TAT after their participation had slowed down - don't remember him but my condolences to Jean and the family and friends. Sorry I missed that conversation regarding why men have nipples. I'm sure that it was interesting.
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meganfernandez ponchi101 wrote: ↑Tue Jul 15, 2025 7:53 pm
Oploskkofie, thanks for posting this. It saddens me to hear of Jessie181 passing.
If you consider it appropriate, extend my, and our, condolences to his family. May all their memories of him be wonderful, and may them remember him always with love.
RIP.
I second this. I remember them both. So very sad.
by Suliso I don't remember him very well. Still very sad as he was nowhere near very old.
by nelslus OMG. He was still a kid in my eyes! Jessie was a major part of the Indian Wells Tailgate that I think went on for three years. I adored the guy, and loved spending time with him then. But, I have managed to lose touch with almost all of the members of the original TAT group members who no longer go in here. Hell, I barely go in here these days. I just looked up that Jessie and I had last chatted two years ago via Facebook. And before THAT, it had been a few years. Why sometimes bonds break off is beyond me at this moment.
I have been so insanely busy with this newish job that I have had since October of last year. So much of my time otherwise goes to my partner John....thirty years plus. With too few exceptions, I have been a sh*t friend.
Just in case, I messaged some OG TAT members via Facebook to let them know, although some I have not messaged with for years, and I have no idea who has and has not kept in touch with. UGH.
This is just such horrible news. I am 65, so whenever I go will never be any kind of tragedy. But someone that young....Devastating. The cliche, life is too f***ing short. Folks, Jessie was just a good guy. My heartfelt condolences go out to his family and friends.
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Oploskoffie dryrunguy wrote: ↑Wed Jul 16, 2025 3:43 pm
Above all else, I'll remember it was Jessie who turned me on to the band Paramore. Until he mentioned them to me in a PM conversation we were having about music, I was largely unaware of them. I know of them, but I had never made a point of listening to them. So he exposed me to them. I always appreciated that.
Just zooming in on this aspect for a moment. To say Jessie loved music is to say Cookie Monster is not opposed to the regular consumption of a certain type of baked goods. I started using a certain music tracker back in 2006 and may or may not have been (part of) the reason for him starting to use it in early 2007. We'd spoken of a shared appreciation for certain bands like Garbage and Sade, but then there also several others I'd never heard of mentioned who he thought I should try out. Said music tracker offered the perfect way to get "Jessie recommendations" without having to ask.
Despite him not actively "tracking" his music for about 9 years, I was still exploring new artists based on his listening habits from between 2007 and 2012 when he got back in to doing that in 2021. Despite the tracker saying our musical compatibility is
super (and him listening to Tegan and Sara 26.519 times

) I'll happily admit to not recognising over 85% of what he listened to. I consider it a gift that keeps on giving, the latest Jessie-addition to my own listening experience being a group called MICHELLE. Through music alone, I'll probably be remembering Jessie for the rest of my life.
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Oploskoffie nelslus wrote: ↑Thu Jul 17, 2025 3:47 am
OMG. He was still a kid in my eyes! Jessie was a major part of the Indian Wells Tailgate that I think went on for three years. I adored the guy, and loved spending time with him then. But, I have managed to lose touch with almost all of the members of the original TAT group members who no longer go in here. Hell, I barely go in here these days. I just looked up that Jessie and I had last chatted two years ago via Facebook. And before THAT, it had been a few years. Why sometimes bonds break off is beyond me at this moment.
I have been so insanely busy with this newish job that I have had since October of last year. So much of my time otherwise goes to my partner John....thirty years plus. With too few exceptions, I have been a sh*t friend.
Honestly, I've felt like that myself at times. But then, apart from my not being the most adept at making friends in the first place, what you mention about a new job, the time you want to spend with your partner, these kinds of things probably apply to most of us.
I have backtracked a little on finding things like "life gets in the way" BS reasons for losing touch with people, especially if the main space of interaction was/is the internet. Jessie and Jean are a great example of people who did not let time(zones) and distance get in the way, but in both friendships and acquaintanceships, it will always help matters if you actually see someone more often, get to interact in
that different way. My making a distinction between online friends and the like and offline friends takes nothing away from anyone, I feel, but there is a difference. So, whether it was with, say, mmmm8, Danielle, Jean, Jessie or even you

I came to appreciate the little moments there were on Facebook or elsewhere a lot more without feeling weird about anything.
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Oploskoffie ponchi101 wrote: ↑Tue Jul 15, 2025 7:53 pm
If you consider it appropriate, extend my, and our, condolences to his family. May all their memories of him be wonderful, and may them remember him always with love.
Jean is being kept up-to-date of the postings in this thread. If there is anything she can communicate to Jessie's family, then I'm sure she will.